INBOXtext / audio / video / actionLucretia speaking. Obviously I uh... can't talk right now. Drop me a message and I'll get back to you ASAP.art creditcode credit
(She's barely got herself settled in her new room when Lup comes calling; then again, they'd half-planned this happening. Lup had been willing to give her a couple hours to process alone before coming to keep her company, and the little break has been the perfect amount of time. She answers the door with a journal wedged underneath of her arm, eyes lighting up when she sees the bottle of wine.
It's been that kind of day.)
Hey. (She gives the door a little push open with her fingertips,) Welcome to my humble abode.
(It's certainly humble: it's very tiny, the walls round and old looking. There's a circular window in the living room and an old couch and small bookcase (complete with the three journals she had brought with her), but everything has a second-hand quality to it.)
[Lup's smile doesn't exactly reach her eyes, not after Taako's dramatic exit from their shared room minutes earlier, but she certainly makes an attempt.]
Sup, girlfriend. I brought house warming gifts! First-- [She holds the wine bottle up with a shake while her other hand stays hidden behind her back.] Definitely needed after this whole day, huh?
(Is all she says, and exhales slowly through her nose. In an ideal world, she'd go to sleep now and forgo thinking about this until much later, but this isn't an ideal world by any stretch of the meaning. Even Lup looks a little pinched; Lucretia smiles back weakly, and invites her in.)
Thank you, Lup. For coming over I mean, I appreciate it.
(She doesn't want to be alone on her first night here.)
[In his fit, Lup hadn't exactly gotten the full details on what went down between Taako and Lucretia, but it's pretty clear it hadn't been great.]
Hey, don't thank me yet! I still have something else. [Lup steps inside when invited, just enough to where she can nudge the door shut with her foot behind her.] Voilà ! [Fulfilling her earlier promise, Lup pulls out her hidden hand and reveals a few tubes of paint in various colors and a handful of brushes.] I never want to hear that Lup doesn't fulfill her promises!
[Wasting no time in handing the supplies over, Lup moves further into the apartment after setting the wine aside, the elf letting loose a whistle like she hadn't just been there when Lucretia scooped this place up hours earlier.] Nice digs! Already has that good Lucretia vibe.
Oh! (Lup is consistently the best. Lucretia can't help smile at the sight of the paints and brushes, accepting them all at once into both of her hands. She drops one of the brushes on her way back into the living room and has to go back for it: it's of very good quality, the handle plastic but the bristles of medium-firmness, the way she prefers this. She wonders if Lup did this on purpose, or if it was a co-incidence.
The colours of the paint are interesting, too.)
Did you pick these out? (The choices are very true to Lup, if so. Red, blue, yellow, electric green, dark pink. Lucretia's favourite is the light teal. She groups them all neatly on the bookshelf, already wondering what exactly she'll paint with them: she hasn't seen any colours as bright as these amongst Hadriel's natural scenery.)
Thanks. Hopefully I can fill the bookshelf up a little more, but aside from that I'm happy with it. (When Lup sets the bottle of wine aside, Lucretia winces, grinning sheepishly.) Um, I don't own any glasses.
[With her gifts given, Lup automatically moves across the room as she inspects Lucretia's small apartment over, the elf practically gliding to the nearest window to peer outside. Considering their floor is closer to the ground level, it's obvious that Lucretia's has the better view, an almost picturesque look at the strange world they'd been dropped into. Hadriel is anything but beautiful, not with it's lack of sunlight and greenery, boring rock expanding out endlessly around them and trapping them in. But at least the architecture is interesting and new, curving and weirdly organic-looking.
Hadriel is generally kind of a shitty place, but Lup hopes that Lucretia can find inspiration for her art here. And hopefully some use for the bright colors she was able to procure.]
Sure did. My friend was willing to trade me for the primary colors and I managed to find a few of the others while scavenging earlier. [She turns to shoot Lucretia a quick grin.] Brushes too. That was all I could find in the shops today, but I'll keep an eye out for you. See if any canvases pop up.
[Books too, she reminds herself. Oh, and apparently glasses too. Lup would really have to look hard to see what she could cobble together the next day to fill in these little gaps. She understands why Lucretia isn't living with them: The apartment they currently have is too small. Lucretia is a private person and needs her own space. Taako is not currently her biggest fan. There's more than enough to reason why the other woman coming to live with them would be a less than pleasant experience, but Lup still feels a little shitty about it.
Even not being remembered by Magnus, she'd felt so incredibly welcomed by the boys into their home, back into their lives, like she'd never left. With Lucretia just up a few floors and Taako being his usual self, Lup knows her pal isn't getting that same treatment. And that just sucks. So, she'll do what she can to help her friend settle, to try and fill in the gaps of things she needs to make a new home here in Hadriel. It's not much, but Lup is trying.]
Hey, like that's ever stopped us before. We can sit, drink straight out the bottle and--[and, gods, she doesn't meant to sound obvious about it, but there's just enough of a pause between words to make anyone suspicious.] Uh, chat.
(Lucretia takes a seat on her little couch, and grins, pleased that Lup had bothered to go through so much trouble just for paints and brushes.)
Thank you Lup. I appreciate it. (Hopefully she can settle into some degree of normalcy here, despite having to live by herself. It will be strange, not having to worry about opening the bathroom door on somebody who had forgotten to lock it; not seeing anybody on her way to the kitchen at midnight; being able to put a hand on her things at all times because nobody will be trying to tidy up after her as she goes (Barry), or straight-up borrowing-without-returning anything (Magnus).
It's funny: at times she had longed for this kind of privacy, and to live without people who knew how to charm open a locked door and dismantle your wards with ease but now that she has pretty much that, she doesn't want it any more. Does it ever not work like that? She's going to miss the awful company, the lot of them: Merle's good jokes (and his bad ones), walking in on Lup shaving her head into the kitchen sink, Davenport's illusion gambits catching her by surprise at two in the morning, Taako leaving an abundance of clothes all over place.
Lup's clumsy shift into addressing the elephant in the room makes Lucretia sigh, her shoulders dropping as she sinks into the couch.)
Yeah, we can chat. About your brother. (They both know why Lup's here. She reaches for the bottle of wine and uncaps it definitively, handing it to Lup for the first swig.)
What's... what's his deal? Lup, he looked at me like I've never seen before.
[Naturally, Lucretia's too perceptive to not know exactly what's gnawing on Lup's mind, the worry that is so easily read in the tense line along her shoulders. Lup wastes no time in plopping next to the other woman on her new couch, immediately curling her legs under her while turning to face Lucretia. She accepts the wine and throws her head back in a single, fluid motion, taking a quick swig before passing the bottle back.
Wiping her mouth off with the back of her hand, Lup knows there's no point in trying to pretend things are fine. No matter what she does or doesn't tell Lucretia tonight, it won't change how pissed off Taako is right now.]
It's complicated. [a beat] Which is the absolute shittiest answer to anything, but fuck. Luce, it's a shitshow. And I don't know how to explain it without like, telling you everything that I've heard. And Taako, he's... [Her voice trails off, while Lup debates the best way to approach this. She's only heard the story second-hand, she really isn't the best option to tell Lucretia about a future she's never come close to experiencing, but she owes it to her friend. If not her, then who?]
You know, when I first got here, Magnus didn't know who I was. He still doesn't, technically. I mean, we've met and he knows who I am now cause we live together, but... He doesn't remember any of the mission. Doesn't remember me at all. And he came from the same time Taako did.
(Lup throwing back the first drink so dramatically makes her laugh, tight and nervous; she takes the bottle and helps herself to a rather long glug in return. It's pretty good wine, actually. She can always count on Lup to bring the booze.)
He– you know, he had a similar reaction to me when he saw me in the colosseum, actually. He... he seemed surprised that I knew his name.
(She frowns, staring at Lup's knee while in contemplation of the whole thing.) It must have something to do with the cycles, (she says eventually, fielding ideas as she goes.) Perhaps they affect memory some how? But Merle and Taako both knew who I was no problem so that's... out.
(She can't imagine if they hadn't known her at all: how awful that must have been for Lup. She drops her palm onto the back of Lup's, gives it a reassuring squeeze, and passes the bottle of wine.) So it's only affecting Magnus for some reason, but you sound like you know exactly why. Or at least, have a theory. Why can't you just tell me?
[Everything sucks and this is hell. Lucretia's theories, the mental notes she's talking through taking, her nervous laugh, the weight of her hand against Lup's. All of it is so strikingly familiar that something sharp jabs at Lup's heart. No matter what Taako says, she just can't see the woman Lucretia supposedly becomes inside of her friend. Granted, she only knows of The Director second-hand, all told through her brother's spitting anger and hurt. Because of that, it's easy to imagine Lucretia and her future self as two separate entities, The Director a sort of an evil doppelgänger to the wonderful woman sitting at her side.
It's just so much easier to think of that way. It makes this conversation seem like it's about someone else entirely.]
I know why because Taako told me. [Lup takes the bottle and rests it at her knee, fingers tapping out a random rhythm on it's neck. It's difficult, to bring up crimes that Lucretia isn't even responsible knowing she's already being judged for them. But she deserves to know what's going on with her brother, why their friends may have been peering so oddly at her earlier that day. And really, there is just no way to sugarcoat what she has to say.]
He said you erased everyone's memories of me. Fed my info to Magnus' stupid jellyfish and, just, poof. [Her fingers finally stop drumming, going still on the neck of the bottle, but her gaze stays fixed on Lucretia's face. Lup doesn't look happy revealing this information, but she also doesn't look upset over it either. She just appears a little melancholy, the corners of her mouth pulling downwards.] No more Lup.
I figured, (she supplies, tipping her head with an expectant sort of smile: Lup's follow up wipes it right off. She blinks, her mouth popping open in surprise and confusing as she tries to piece this together.)
I don't understand, (is the first thing she says. She's staring at Lup's grip on the neck of the wine bottle. Lup is watching her carefully; Lucretia can't think of how she's supposed to react to this. It sounds absurd to her. There isn't enough context and surely Lup knows this?) I– why would I do something like that?
(She's experimented with the voidfish before, of course. From the moment the ichor splashed into her mouth by accident at the Legato Conservatory Lucretia had been trying out different ways of erasing tiny, meaningless bits of information; fascinating stuff. The harm that a voidfish could do if in the wrong hands was not lost on her but... she'd never thought for a second about using it to hurt anybody. Never. Lup's explanation simply doesn't make sense to her.)
[Lucretia's answer just further supports Lup's twisted theory. Her Lucretia just would never pull this shit. Never hurt the family they'd made.
Lup passes the bottle back without taking a drink. Honestly, Lucretia might need it more.]
So, we made the relics. Split the light to hide it from the Hunger, right? Well, no big surprise, Barry and I got it right. [For once, her mouth doesn't curl smugly to the side at that victory. Instead, she shifts on the couch, leaning back into the cushions and letting her gaze wander around Lucretia's apartment while she spoke.] The whole plan worked, the Hunger never came. Now just came the wait and we'd all be home free. Except not. A war broke out, fighting over the shit we made. And the one I made just... [She hasn't even gotten to this point yet in the timeline, Lup's fifty years behind but just the idea of what something she's made done makes an uncharacteristic grimness set in about her. Her lips purse tightly into a thin line, posture tense.]
Guess it killed like, tons. Leveled whole towns. Just black glass everywhere. So I left. Couldn't watch the thing I put out there destroy this world that wasn't even ours. And that was the last time Taako or you or anyone ever saw me. I just disappeared.
Taako said that you fed Fisher everything about me and about the mission. So no one would remember one another, so they'd have forgotten me since I was already lost. Just so you could do your whole shield spell without interference.
(She takes the bottle with a wordless mumble, taking another long sip from it while Lup explains. And then she has a third, just because this is insane.)
Well, that explains why he looked at me like that, (she says eventually, staring straight ahead, dropping the wine bottle gently onto the couch beside her and holding it loosely by the neck. Her instinct is to wonder whether or not Taako had been entirely truthful, but that's a theory that is dispelled quickly; he'd told this to Lup after all, and she knows they keep nothing from each other. Taako wouldn't lie about something as big as this. A betrayal of sorts, with her at the center.
Lucretia sinks slowly back into the couch, and feels sick. Lup's explanation washes over her and still makes no sense– it feels like such an overreaction. Sure, she's a little sore that her plan didn't fly with the others but to then turn around and erase memories because of it? Just to get her way?)
I wouldn't do that, (she says, quietly. If there's uncertainty in her voice, it's only because she's so sure that Taako couldn't possibly be lying. But if that is the case, then what does that leave her? He couldn't possibly be telling the truth, either.) There must be more to this, Lup. I– um, I'm not saying that Taako isn't correct, but... I mean, did I ever say anything about it to him? In this future, I mean.
It sounds like there's a lot more to this than either of us know.
Lucretia. [And god, it's such a heavy topic, just dropped as casually as possible into Lucretia's lap, but Lup rolls her eyes like it's nothing.] I know. If I thought you were capable of something like that, we wouldn't be having this convo. I try to not associate with complete assholes. [a beat] Well, bigger assholes than our friends. [a poor attempt at a joke? definitely, but it's so tense, she has to interject with something stupid to lighten the mood.]
I dunno. I don't think so. He makes it sound like he popped into Hadriel right after being drinking fish goo and remembering me. You, uh, Future You and him probably didn't have much of a chance to talk. Merle knows who I am, so I guess we could chat at him for more info, but... [She shrugs. He's also Merle, so getting that information may be a little difficult. What they had to ask were very difficult questions, the very kind that a guy like Merle preferred to avoid, dancing away from them.
Lup knows this is awful, knows her brother and his hurt well enough to know he's not going to forgive Lucretia easily, even if this version of her hasn't done a thing. It's unfair, but after what he'd been put through, Lup couldn't bring herself to tell him he was wrong. They are still working to get their shit together, to fall back into step, she's not going to tell him to stop hurting and suck it up. But her heart does go out to Lucretia, their friend, knowing how hard it's going to be living with the weight of something she never did hanging over her.
She rests a hand on Lucretia's shoulder.] Either way, there's your answer. It's a shitty one, but it's all I've got. Oh, also apparently I'm a bomb-ass lich in the future, so I'm probably not dead. Er, not more dead. Just maybe lost? Trapped? Either way, now that Taako remembers me, I'm sure he'll track me down.
(Lup is being too casual for the moment, too colloquial; Lucretia winces at her off-handed remark about 'complete assholes'. She knows that as much she wants to stew in this and think and think, Lup won't let her, and she doesn't know how she feels about that. Thinking of Taako believing so strongly that she would have done this to hurt him, as if more than ninety years spent together count for nothing? It's hard to swallow. She wants time to be able to process it.
She reaches up, puts her hand onto Lup's and holds it tight.)
Okay, (she says slowly, trying to think instead of lose herself to this future scenario. Merle is the person to ask. Got it. She will go and ask him about it and she'll take Lup with her because she's too uncertain to go on her own, not know that she knows this. Did she take something from Merle too, or just his memories of the mission, and of Lup?
Knowing Lup disappeared entirely before any of this happened adds another layer of confusion and sadness to the whole thing because she can't imagine the terror of that. How Taako, and Barry would have reacted. Even imagining it makes her heart ache and that distress is mirroring on her face now, expression crumpling.
Lucretia finds she can't answer anything else. She simply nods, and gives Lup's hand a squeeze to remind herself that, despite everything she's just learned, she is still there.)
[Try as she might to make this whole conversation as easy as possible, rolling her eyes and throwing in casual jokes, it's the sight of Lucretia's crumbling expression that does Lup in. The heavy weight that's been siting on her chest since this whole revelation weeks earlier seems to have doubled in size, the elf shooting her a look as worry forms between her knitted brows.]
Oh. [And Lup wastes no time at all in reaching out to pull Lucretia into her embrace, wrapping the other woman up in her arms, closing the distance between them in a hug. She doesn't have a clue how she's going to do it, especially trapped in Hadriel as they were, but she's going to fight like hell to make all of this right again.] Oh, hun. C'mere, Luc. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. Don't make a frown like that, your face is gonna stay that way.
[Lup reaches up a hand to rub a few soothing circles at Lucretia's back. All of her techniques for comfort come from her experience trying to comfort Taako, which as of late, she's been getting a lot of use out of.] I'll work on Taako, kay? Just.. Just give him some time. You know how he used to be. Well, now he's even more. Not having me around really messed with him. He's still upset, still hurting, even though I'm right there with him. [Sometimes it feels like he doesn't even believe she's real, he's so stuck in mourning the sister he knew.]
I know it's rich hearing it from me, but just be patient. Please?
(She sighs and props her chin up on Lup's shoulder as the other woman draws her into a tight hug. It's an easy gesture, but it helps a lot. It only reminds her that back in the time she's come from she hadn't had a good, long conversation with Lup in a while. The both of them had been so busy lately with their respective plans. She can't remember the last time Lup had hugged her quite like this either, or her Lup; it makes her sad. The last couple of cycles have been face-paced, brutal as the Hunger gets quicker, cleverer, and it's really the kind of time that the both of them need hugs the most.
'I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere'. She sinks properly into the hug, linking her arms in a neat circle about Lup's waist.)
Thanks, Lup. (She mumbles eventually and sighs hard for a second time, as if she's trying to expel all her negativity through her mouth.)
I'll... I'll try. (She doesn't know if she can promise her patience, but if it's what Lup recommends, she can certainly try to keep it in mind as much as possible. It's just that it's going to be hard, avoiding a dear, dear friend when all she wants to do is try and talk to him about it, to get more information. She needs to know why this happened, why she causes it. Lup's retelling is too bare-bones for her liking.)
[When she feels that soft pressure against her shoulder, Lup tilts her head to the side, affectionately bumping their heads together. It had taken years aboard the Starblaster for the elf to let anyone else close to her enough for this kind of tender closeness, but Lucretia's been there in the sweet spot for decades at this point. So as the other woman adjusts to turn this into a proper hug, Lup laughs and squeezes her back.] Horseshit. Like you ever have to try and do anything. The Lucretia I know is always on point. You'll be fine, lady.
[It sucks, but Lup knows they'll all pull through this. Nothing could break their little family apart permanently. She believes in them too much for that.]
So, [Lup lets Lucretia linger in the hug for as long as she needs, but whenever the woman pulls away, she'd still keep an arm slung around her shoulder, bodies tilted together.] Now that the crappy stuff is out of the way, we can get this party started. Taako's being a real dipshit so I'm going to crash with you a few days. [Surprise!] Maybe later you can fill me in more on whatever we've been up to between our cycles. Since we've already shared too much about the future, it can't hurt, right?
(Lup's arm is warm around her shoulders: this, and the promise of company really helps Lucretia to relax completely. She sinks back into the couch with a sigh, arms folding loosely across her chest. Thank god, honestly. She hadn't been looking forward to spending her first night here alone in her room, but hadn't been feeling up to asking anybody for company, either. Not with how the afternoon had gone. Thankfully, Lup provides the perfect balance of 'down for sleepovers always' and 'isn't as mad as she could have been about this whole future deal'.)
Yeah, that sounds good. Though I'll give you fair warning: there's a lot to fill you in on. (Oh. Of course Lup doesn't know about the cycle she spent alone. Lucretia doesn't know how she feels about that. Perhaps she can skip around it– but she's hardly talked about it since it happened, and there is a little, reasonable voice in the back of her mind that knows that she really ought to, despite her reservations.
She sighs. Everything feels unnecessarily complicated.) And not all of it's good.
[Lup doesn't need to be thanked, so she shoos Lucretia's words away with a wave of her hand before she's reaching for the wine. There's too many emotions up in this tiny apartment, Lup is ready to just get buzzed with her friend and put the unpleasantness of the day behind them. At least for tonight. Tomorrow they can make a few more plans. She can show Lucretia around town, tell her all of the places to visit, the ones to avoid. Point out the people on the network that Lup's already formed relationships with and has come to trust at least slightly. Point out the ones she doesn't trust at all.
She'll do what she can to help prepare her friend, because this place wasn't going to make it easy to adjust to. Lup knew that from experience.]
When is it ever all good? I can take it, no problem. [Some parts may be more difficult to digest than others, but Lup's already had her big once-a-decade emotional breakdown with Taako over this shit. She's feeling pretty confident she can go for round two and not cry this time.
Lucretia's sigh just drags Lup's attention back to her side at the other woman. She elbows her in the side and passes the wine back over.] Let's put that talk away for now. Chat about something less depressing. Like how great a friend I am for bringing you a housewarming gift.
(She laughs in response to that even through her inner turmoil, taking the bottle and lifting it slowly. She lets it rest against her mouth for a moment before she takes a long sip. It's funny– Lup being from an earlier time, but still knowing her so deeply regardless, knowing the best option for her right now isn't sitting, and stewing in this. Lucretia knocks her knee against Lup's, takes another quick gulp from the bottle and then hands it back.)
Okay, okay. Fair.
You are my best friend for bringing me this housewarming gift. Both the wine, and the paints by the way. (She is truly happy about those.) I'll paint something for your place. Something– bizzare, and colourful.
(She can see it in her mind's eye, now that she's thinking about it with a slight thrum of alcohol in her blood.) Just to liven up the place, you know?
[It's all just as strange to Lup, who is having a fairly difficult time even believing the two are actually from varying times. Sure, there's a little something unfamiliar about Lucretia, something stronger and harder and so much more confident, but just gazing at the woman pressed against her side, the elf keeps looking for signs of her age and finding nothing. It had been so much easier with the other three, who all had been out of the cycles for over a decade and had at least a little visible wear on their bodies.
But Lucretia physically looks exactly like Lup remembers last seeing her. There's the same warmth behind her smile, the same faint laugh lines that Lup continues to insist she caused, the same soft flush at her cheeks whenever the two of them drink together. She's both familiar and yet not familiar all at once, but Lup chooses to just embrace the unknown in this moment and just go with it. Lucretia is still Lucretia, whether it's one or two or forty-five years between them.
(Naturally, her stance on that might alter slightly if she was dealing with a Lucretia who'd taken her brother and their friend's memories, but that's a hypothetical that Lup's not willing to exert energy getting upset about right now.)
When the other woman bumps knees against her, Lup laughs and retaliates in kind, knocking her shoulder against Lucretia's. After the drama of her reunion with Taako and Magnus just not even knowing who she was, this feels so much easier. Things aren't fixed and there's so much more that needs to be said, but in this moment, Lup can just bump knees with her best friend, drink wine straight from the bottle, and relish how simple all of this feels.
Lup takes a generous swig when offered the bottle back, wiping her mouth off with the back of her hand.]
I just wanted to do something nice. Magnus and Merle got their own gifts--[a shark dick and a stack of outdated Zoobooks, respectively] So only seemed fair. It--... [No, didn't she herself just say to leave the sad shit behind? The elf shakes her head and grins.] Glad you like it. And hell yeah, that would be rad. A Luc original on my wall.
(That little moment of sincere honesty makes Lucretia smile, and properly this time too, in the way that only her friends can get her to smile.)
Well, thank you. (She slumps back against the couch cushions with her arms folded comfortingly across herself, shoulder pressed to Lup's. This is the most... normal she's felt in a while. The decision on what plan to stick to had upset her enough to have her forgoing any interaction with the others afterwards and before all of that had gone down, they hadn't exactly been kicking back and relaxing. Ever since they got past the eighty-something mark, the Hunger had tightened its resolve: really stuck its head down and worked to get to them. The lights were getting harder and harder to find. They were all so tired. Lucretia can't remember the last time she'd just sat with somebody and drank for fun instead of out of obligation, or in an attempt to forget about something she'd seen.
God, how dark. She gives her head a little shake to clear it of those particular thoughts, mirroring Lup's gesture. Lup's right. They don't need to get into this now: they have time. And she's done her time today, with Taako, with Magnus, and Merle. Lup, too.)
I do like it. You– this is really helpful, you know? Um, (and she casts about for another word, gesturing in the air with one hand,) cathartic. You ground me, Lup. You always have, and I appreciate it. It's cool.
[Coming in fresh after cycle forty-seven, Lup doesn't have a clue about how hard it will get. Even being told those words pointblank, she can't quite understand the harsh truth waiting for her. They go from spending a year casually learning new arts to present to the cave to Lucretia's horrific year alone and Lup deciding that ripping out her soul was the only way for them to continue surviving.
Things get pretty dark in their future.
So Lup shrugs Lucretia's thankfulness off, just assuming that her future self had been keeping up on her promise to make time for the two of them to just have fun. Even with the Hunger always looming in the distance, why would that ever change?]
Don't go all sentimental on me. Get enough of that from Mags. Just chill and drink with me and we can, I dunno, play a stupid game or something. Like normal. Or we could paint some dope shit on your walls for kicks, but then you'd have to live with it and I can't promise I won't do anything inappropriate.
action; 8/10
this elf.]
id give it a 10/10
It's been that kind of day.)
Hey. (She gives the door a little push open with her fingertips,) Welcome to my humble abode.
(It's certainly humble: it's very tiny, the walls round and old looking. There's a circular window in the living room and an old couch and small bookcase (complete with the three journals she had brought with her), but everything has a second-hand quality to it.)
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Sup, girlfriend. I brought house warming gifts! First-- [She holds the wine bottle up with a shake while her other hand stays hidden behind her back.] Definitely needed after this whole day, huh?
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(Is all she says, and exhales slowly through her nose. In an ideal world, she'd go to sleep now and forgo thinking about this until much later, but this isn't an ideal world by any stretch of the meaning. Even Lup looks a little pinched; Lucretia smiles back weakly, and invites her in.)
Thank you, Lup. For coming over I mean, I appreciate it.
(She doesn't want to be alone on her first night here.)
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Hey, don't thank me yet! I still have something else. [Lup steps inside when invited, just enough to where she can nudge the door shut with her foot behind her.] Voilà ! [Fulfilling her earlier promise, Lup pulls out her hidden hand and reveals a few tubes of paint in various colors and a handful of brushes.] I never want to hear that Lup doesn't fulfill her promises!
[Wasting no time in handing the supplies over, Lup moves further into the apartment after setting the wine aside, the elf letting loose a whistle like she hadn't just been there when Lucretia scooped this place up hours earlier.] Nice digs! Already has that good Lucretia vibe.
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The colours of the paint are interesting, too.)
Did you pick these out? (The choices are very true to Lup, if so. Red, blue, yellow, electric green, dark pink. Lucretia's favourite is the light teal. She groups them all neatly on the bookshelf, already wondering what exactly she'll paint with them: she hasn't seen any colours as bright as these amongst Hadriel's natural scenery.)
Thanks. Hopefully I can fill the bookshelf up a little more, but aside from that I'm happy with it. (When Lup sets the bottle of wine aside, Lucretia winces, grinning sheepishly.) Um, I don't own any glasses.
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Hadriel is generally kind of a shitty place, but Lup hopes that Lucretia can find inspiration for her art here. And hopefully some use for the bright colors she was able to procure.]
Sure did. My friend was willing to trade me for the primary colors and I managed to find a few of the others while scavenging earlier. [She turns to shoot Lucretia a quick grin.] Brushes too. That was all I could find in the shops today, but I'll keep an eye out for you. See if any canvases pop up.
[Books too, she reminds herself. Oh, and apparently glasses too. Lup would really have to look hard to see what she could cobble together the next day to fill in these little gaps. She understands why Lucretia isn't living with them: The apartment they currently have is too small. Lucretia is a private person and needs her own space. Taako is not currently her biggest fan. There's more than enough to reason why the other woman coming to live with them would be a less than pleasant experience, but Lup still feels a little shitty about it.
Even not being remembered by Magnus, she'd felt so incredibly welcomed by the boys into their home, back into their lives, like she'd never left. With Lucretia just up a few floors and Taako being his usual self, Lup knows her pal isn't getting that same treatment. And that just sucks. So, she'll do what she can to help her friend settle, to try and fill in the gaps of things she needs to make a new home here in Hadriel. It's not much, but Lup is trying.]
Hey, like that's ever stopped us before. We can sit, drink straight out the bottle and--[and, gods, she doesn't meant to sound obvious about it, but there's just enough of a pause between words to make anyone suspicious.] Uh, chat.
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Thank you Lup. I appreciate it. (Hopefully she can settle into some degree of normalcy here, despite having to live by herself. It will be strange, not having to worry about opening the bathroom door on somebody who had forgotten to lock it; not seeing anybody on her way to the kitchen at midnight; being able to put a hand on her things at all times because nobody will be trying to tidy up after her as she goes (Barry), or straight-up borrowing-without-returning anything (Magnus).
It's funny: at times she had longed for this kind of privacy, and to live without people who knew how to charm open a locked door and dismantle your wards with ease but now that she has pretty much that, she doesn't want it any more. Does it ever not work like that? She's going to miss the awful company, the lot of them: Merle's good jokes (and his bad ones), walking in on Lup shaving her head into the kitchen sink, Davenport's illusion gambits catching her by surprise at two in the morning, Taako leaving an abundance of clothes all over place.
Lup's clumsy shift into addressing the elephant in the room makes Lucretia sigh, her shoulders dropping as she sinks into the couch.)
Yeah, we can chat. About your brother. (They both know why Lup's here. She reaches for the bottle of wine and uncaps it definitively, handing it to Lup for the first swig.)
What's... what's his deal? Lup, he looked at me like I've never seen before.
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Wiping her mouth off with the back of her hand, Lup knows there's no point in trying to pretend things are fine. No matter what she does or doesn't tell Lucretia tonight, it won't change how pissed off Taako is right now.]
It's complicated. [a beat] Which is the absolute shittiest answer to anything, but fuck. Luce, it's a shitshow. And I don't know how to explain it without like, telling you everything that I've heard. And Taako, he's... [Her voice trails off, while Lup debates the best way to approach this. She's only heard the story second-hand, she really isn't the best option to tell Lucretia about a future she's never come close to experiencing, but she owes it to her friend. If not her, then who?]
You know, when I first got here, Magnus didn't know who I was. He still doesn't, technically. I mean, we've met and he knows who I am now cause we live together, but... He doesn't remember any of the mission. Doesn't remember me at all. And he came from the same time Taako did.
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He– you know, he had a similar reaction to me when he saw me in the colosseum, actually. He... he seemed surprised that I knew his name.
(She frowns, staring at Lup's knee while in contemplation of the whole thing.) It must have something to do with the cycles, (she says eventually, fielding ideas as she goes.) Perhaps they affect memory some how? But Merle and Taako both knew who I was no problem so that's... out.
(She can't imagine if they hadn't known her at all: how awful that must have been for Lup. She drops her palm onto the back of Lup's, gives it a reassuring squeeze, and passes the bottle of wine.) So it's only affecting Magnus for some reason, but you sound like you know exactly why. Or at least, have a theory. Why can't you just tell me?
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It's just so much easier to think of that way. It makes this conversation seem like it's about someone else entirely.]
I know why because Taako told me. [Lup takes the bottle and rests it at her knee, fingers tapping out a random rhythm on it's neck. It's difficult, to bring up crimes that Lucretia isn't even responsible knowing she's already being judged for them. But she deserves to know what's going on with her brother, why their friends may have been peering so oddly at her earlier that day. And really, there is just no way to sugarcoat what she has to say.]
He said you erased everyone's memories of me. Fed my info to Magnus' stupid jellyfish and, just, poof. [Her fingers finally stop drumming, going still on the neck of the bottle, but her gaze stays fixed on Lucretia's face. Lup doesn't look happy revealing this information, but she also doesn't look upset over it either. She just appears a little melancholy, the corners of her mouth pulling downwards.] No more Lup.
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I don't understand, (is the first thing she says. She's staring at Lup's grip on the neck of the wine bottle. Lup is watching her carefully; Lucretia can't think of how she's supposed to react to this. It sounds absurd to her. There isn't enough context and surely Lup knows this?) I– why would I do something like that?
(She's experimented with the voidfish before, of course. From the moment the ichor splashed into her mouth by accident at the Legato Conservatory Lucretia had been trying out different ways of erasing tiny, meaningless bits of information; fascinating stuff. The harm that a voidfish could do if in the wrong hands was not lost on her but... she'd never thought for a second about using it to hurt anybody. Never. Lup's explanation simply doesn't make sense to her.)
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Lup passes the bottle back without taking a drink. Honestly, Lucretia might need it more.]
So, we made the relics. Split the light to hide it from the Hunger, right? Well, no big surprise, Barry and I got it right. [For once, her mouth doesn't curl smugly to the side at that victory. Instead, she shifts on the couch, leaning back into the cushions and letting her gaze wander around Lucretia's apartment while she spoke.] The whole plan worked, the Hunger never came. Now just came the wait and we'd all be home free. Except not. A war broke out, fighting over the shit we made. And the one I made just... [She hasn't even gotten to this point yet in the timeline, Lup's fifty years behind but just the idea of what something she's made done makes an uncharacteristic grimness set in about her. Her lips purse tightly into a thin line, posture tense.]
Guess it killed like, tons. Leveled whole towns. Just black glass everywhere. So I left. Couldn't watch the thing I put out there destroy this world that wasn't even ours. And that was the last time Taako or you or anyone ever saw me. I just disappeared.
Taako said that you fed Fisher everything about me and about the mission. So no one would remember one another, so they'd have forgotten me since I was already lost. Just so you could do your whole shield spell without interference.
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Well, that explains why he looked at me like that, (she says eventually, staring straight ahead, dropping the wine bottle gently onto the couch beside her and holding it loosely by the neck. Her instinct is to wonder whether or not Taako had been entirely truthful, but that's a theory that is dispelled quickly; he'd told this to Lup after all, and she knows they keep nothing from each other. Taako wouldn't lie about something as big as this. A betrayal of sorts, with her at the center.
Lucretia sinks slowly back into the couch, and feels sick. Lup's explanation washes over her and still makes no sense– it feels like such an overreaction. Sure, she's a little sore that her plan didn't fly with the others but to then turn around and erase memories because of it? Just to get her way?)
I wouldn't do that, (she says, quietly. If there's uncertainty in her voice, it's only because she's so sure that Taako couldn't possibly be lying. But if that is the case, then what does that leave her? He couldn't possibly be telling the truth, either.) There must be more to this, Lup. I– um, I'm not saying that Taako isn't correct, but... I mean, did I ever say anything about it to him? In this future, I mean.
It sounds like there's a lot more to this than either of us know.
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I dunno. I don't think so. He makes it sound like he popped into Hadriel right after being drinking fish goo and remembering me. You, uh, Future You and him probably didn't have much of a chance to talk. Merle knows who I am, so I guess we could chat at him for more info, but... [She shrugs. He's also Merle, so getting that information may be a little difficult. What they had to ask were very difficult questions, the very kind that a guy like Merle preferred to avoid, dancing away from them.
Lup knows this is awful, knows her brother and his hurt well enough to know he's not going to forgive Lucretia easily, even if this version of her hasn't done a thing. It's unfair, but after what he'd been put through, Lup couldn't bring herself to tell him he was wrong. They are still working to get their shit together, to fall back into step, she's not going to tell him to stop hurting and suck it up. But her heart does go out to Lucretia, their friend, knowing how hard it's going to be living with the weight of something she never did hanging over her.
She rests a hand on Lucretia's shoulder.] Either way, there's your answer. It's a shitty one, but it's all I've got. Oh, also apparently I'm a bomb-ass lich in the future, so I'm probably not dead. Er, not more dead. Just maybe lost? Trapped? Either way, now that Taako remembers me, I'm sure he'll track me down.
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She reaches up, puts her hand onto Lup's and holds it tight.)
Okay, (she says slowly, trying to think instead of lose herself to this future scenario. Merle is the person to ask. Got it. She will go and ask him about it and she'll take Lup with her because she's too uncertain to go on her own, not know that she knows this. Did she take something from Merle too, or just his memories of the mission, and of Lup?
Knowing Lup disappeared entirely before any of this happened adds another layer of confusion and sadness to the whole thing because she can't imagine the terror of that. How Taako, and Barry would have reacted. Even imagining it makes her heart ache and that distress is mirroring on her face now, expression crumpling.
Lucretia finds she can't answer anything else. She simply nods, and gives Lup's hand a squeeze to remind herself that, despite everything she's just learned, she is still there.)
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Oh. [And Lup wastes no time at all in reaching out to pull Lucretia into her embrace, wrapping the other woman up in her arms, closing the distance between them in a hug. She doesn't have a clue how she's going to do it, especially trapped in Hadriel as they were, but she's going to fight like hell to make all of this right again.] Oh, hun. C'mere, Luc. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. Don't make a frown like that, your face is gonna stay that way.
[Lup reaches up a hand to rub a few soothing circles at Lucretia's back. All of her techniques for comfort come from her experience trying to comfort Taako, which as of late, she's been getting a lot of use out of.] I'll work on Taako, kay? Just.. Just give him some time. You know how he used to be. Well, now he's even more. Not having me around really messed with him. He's still upset, still hurting, even though I'm right there with him. [Sometimes it feels like he doesn't even believe she's real, he's so stuck in mourning the sister he knew.]
I know it's rich hearing it from me, but just be patient. Please?
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'I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere'. She sinks properly into the hug, linking her arms in a neat circle about Lup's waist.)
Thanks, Lup. (She mumbles eventually and sighs hard for a second time, as if she's trying to expel all her negativity through her mouth.)
I'll... I'll try. (She doesn't know if she can promise her patience, but if it's what Lup recommends, she can certainly try to keep it in mind as much as possible. It's just that it's going to be hard, avoiding a dear, dear friend when all she wants to do is try and talk to him about it, to get more information. She needs to know why this happened, why she causes it. Lup's retelling is too bare-bones for her liking.)
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[It sucks, but Lup knows they'll all pull through this. Nothing could break their little family apart permanently. She believes in them too much for that.]
So, [Lup lets Lucretia linger in the hug for as long as she needs, but whenever the woman pulls away, she'd still keep an arm slung around her shoulder, bodies tilted together.] Now that the crappy stuff is out of the way, we can get this party started. Taako's being a real dipshit so I'm going to crash with you a few days. [Surprise!] Maybe later you can fill me in more on whatever we've been up to between our cycles. Since we've already shared too much about the future, it can't hurt, right?
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(Lup's arm is warm around her shoulders: this, and the promise of company really helps Lucretia to relax completely. She sinks back into the couch with a sigh, arms folding loosely across her chest. Thank god, honestly. She hadn't been looking forward to spending her first night here alone in her room, but hadn't been feeling up to asking anybody for company, either. Not with how the afternoon had gone. Thankfully, Lup provides the perfect balance of 'down for sleepovers always' and 'isn't as mad as she could have been about this whole future deal'.)
Yeah, that sounds good. Though I'll give you fair warning: there's a lot to fill you in on. (Oh. Of course Lup doesn't know about the cycle she spent alone. Lucretia doesn't know how she feels about that. Perhaps she can skip around it– but she's hardly talked about it since it happened, and there is a little, reasonable voice in the back of her mind that knows that she really ought to, despite her reservations.
She sighs. Everything feels unnecessarily complicated.) And not all of it's good.
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She'll do what she can to help prepare her friend, because this place wasn't going to make it easy to adjust to. Lup knew that from experience.]
When is it ever all good? I can take it, no problem. [Some parts may be more difficult to digest than others, but Lup's already had her big once-a-decade emotional breakdown with Taako over this shit. She's feeling pretty confident she can go for round two and not cry this time.
Lucretia's sigh just drags Lup's attention back to her side at the other woman. She elbows her in the side and passes the wine back over.] Let's put that talk away for now. Chat about something less depressing. Like how great a friend I am for bringing you a housewarming gift.
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Okay, okay. Fair.
You are my best friend for bringing me this housewarming gift. Both the wine, and the paints by the way. (She is truly happy about those.) I'll paint something for your place. Something– bizzare, and colourful.
(She can see it in her mind's eye, now that she's thinking about it with a slight thrum of alcohol in her blood.) Just to liven up the place, you know?
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But Lucretia physically looks exactly like Lup remembers last seeing her. There's the same warmth behind her smile, the same faint laugh lines that Lup continues to insist she caused, the same soft flush at her cheeks whenever the two of them drink together. She's both familiar and yet not familiar all at once, but Lup chooses to just embrace the unknown in this moment and just go with it. Lucretia is still Lucretia, whether it's one or two or forty-five years between them.
(Naturally, her stance on that might alter slightly if she was dealing with a Lucretia who'd taken her brother and their friend's memories, but that's a hypothetical that Lup's not willing to exert energy getting upset about right now.)
When the other woman bumps knees against her, Lup laughs and retaliates in kind, knocking her shoulder against Lucretia's. After the drama of her reunion with Taako and Magnus just not even knowing who she was, this feels so much easier. Things aren't fixed and there's so much more that needs to be said, but in this moment, Lup can just bump knees with her best friend, drink wine straight from the bottle, and relish how simple all of this feels.
Lup takes a generous swig when offered the bottle back, wiping her mouth off with the back of her hand.]
I just wanted to do something nice. Magnus and Merle got their own gifts--[a shark dick and a stack of outdated Zoobooks, respectively] So only seemed fair. It--... [No, didn't she herself just say to leave the sad shit behind? The elf shakes her head and grins.] Glad you like it. And hell yeah, that would be rad. A Luc original on my wall.
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Well, thank you. (She slumps back against the couch cushions with her arms folded comfortingly across herself, shoulder pressed to Lup's. This is the most... normal she's felt in a while. The decision on what plan to stick to had upset her enough to have her forgoing any interaction with the others afterwards and before all of that had gone down, they hadn't exactly been kicking back and relaxing. Ever since they got past the eighty-something mark, the Hunger had tightened its resolve: really stuck its head down and worked to get to them. The lights were getting harder and harder to find. They were all so tired. Lucretia can't remember the last time she'd just sat with somebody and drank for fun instead of out of obligation, or in an attempt to forget about something she'd seen.
God, how dark. She gives her head a little shake to clear it of those particular thoughts, mirroring Lup's gesture. Lup's right. They don't need to get into this now: they have time. And she's done her time today, with Taako, with Magnus, and Merle. Lup, too.)
I do like it. You– this is really helpful, you know? Um, (and she casts about for another word, gesturing in the air with one hand,) cathartic. You ground me, Lup. You always have, and I appreciate it. It's cool.
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Things get pretty dark in their future.
So Lup shrugs Lucretia's thankfulness off, just assuming that her future self had been keeping up on her promise to make time for the two of them to just have fun. Even with the Hunger always looming in the distance, why would that ever change?]
Don't go all sentimental on me. Get enough of that from Mags. Just chill and drink with me and we can, I dunno, play a stupid game or something. Like normal. Or we could paint some dope shit on your walls for kicks, but then you'd have to live with it and I can't promise I won't do anything inappropriate.
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