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(She takes the bottle with a wordless mumble, taking another long sip from it while Lup explains. And then she has a third, just because this is insane.)

Well, that explains why he looked at me like that, (she says eventually, staring straight ahead, dropping the wine bottle gently onto the couch beside her and holding it loosely by the neck. Her instinct is to wonder whether or not Taako had been entirely truthful, but that's a theory that is dispelled quickly; he'd told this to Lup after all, and she knows they keep nothing from each other. Taako wouldn't lie about something as big as this. A betrayal of sorts, with her at the center.

Lucretia sinks slowly back into the couch, and feels sick. Lup's explanation washes over her and still makes no sense– it feels like such an overreaction. Sure, she's a little sore that her plan didn't fly with the others but to then turn around and erase memories because of it? Just to get her way?)

I wouldn't do that, (she says, quietly. If there's uncertainty in her voice, it's only because she's so sure that Taako couldn't possibly be lying. But if that is the case, then what does that leave her? He couldn't possibly be telling the truth, either.) There must be more to this, Lup. I– um, I'm not saying that Taako isn't correct, but... I mean, did I ever say anything about it to him? In this future, I mean.

It sounds like there's a lot more to this than either of us know.

Lucretia. [And god, it's such a heavy topic, just dropped as casually as possible into Lucretia's lap, but Lup rolls her eyes like it's nothing.] I know. If I thought you were capable of something like that, we wouldn't be having this convo. I try to not associate with complete assholes. [a beat] Well, bigger assholes than our friends. [a poor attempt at a joke? definitely, but it's so tense, she has to interject with something stupid to lighten the mood.]

I dunno. I don't think so. He makes it sound like he popped into Hadriel right after being drinking fish goo and remembering me. You, uh, Future You and him probably didn't have much of a chance to talk. Merle knows who I am, so I guess we could chat at him for more info, but... [She shrugs. He's also Merle, so getting that information may be a little difficult. What they had to ask were very difficult questions, the very kind that a guy like Merle preferred to avoid, dancing away from them.

Lup knows this is awful, knows her brother and his hurt well enough to know he's not going to forgive Lucretia easily, even if this version of her hasn't done a thing. It's unfair, but after what he'd been put through, Lup couldn't bring herself to tell him he was wrong. They are still working to get their shit together, to fall back into step, she's not going to tell him to stop hurting and suck it up. But her heart does go out to Lucretia, their friend, knowing how hard it's going to be living with the weight of something she never did hanging over her.

She rests a hand on Lucretia's shoulder.] Either way, there's your answer. It's a shitty one, but it's all I've got. Oh, also apparently I'm a bomb-ass lich in the future, so I'm probably not dead. Er, not more dead. Just maybe lost? Trapped? Either way, now that Taako remembers me, I'm sure he'll track me down.

(Lup is being too casual for the moment, too colloquial; Lucretia winces at her off-handed remark about 'complete assholes'. She knows that as much she wants to stew in this and think and think, Lup won't let her, and she doesn't know how she feels about that. Thinking of Taako believing so strongly that she would have done this to hurt him, as if more than ninety years spent together count for nothing? It's hard to swallow. She wants time to be able to process it.

She reaches up, puts her hand onto Lup's and holds it tight.)

Okay, (she says slowly, trying to think instead of lose herself to this future scenario. Merle is the person to ask. Got it. She will go and ask him about it and she'll take Lup with her because she's too uncertain to go on her own, not know that she knows this. Did she take something from Merle too, or just his memories of the mission, and of Lup?

Knowing Lup disappeared entirely before any of this happened adds another layer of confusion and sadness to the whole thing because she can't imagine the terror of that. How Taako, and Barry would have reacted. Even imagining it makes her heart ache and that distress is mirroring on her face now, expression crumpling.

Lucretia finds she can't answer anything else. She simply nods, and gives Lup's hand a squeeze to remind herself that, despite everything she's just learned, she is still there.)

[Try as she might to make this whole conversation as easy as possible, rolling her eyes and throwing in casual jokes, it's the sight of Lucretia's crumbling expression that does Lup in. The heavy weight that's been siting on her chest since this whole revelation weeks earlier seems to have doubled in size, the elf shooting her a look as worry forms between her knitted brows.]

Oh. [And Lup wastes no time at all in reaching out to pull Lucretia into her embrace, wrapping the other woman up in her arms, closing the distance between them in a hug. She doesn't have a clue how she's going to do it, especially trapped in Hadriel as they were, but she's going to fight like hell to make all of this right again.] Oh, hun. C'mere, Luc. I'm here and I'm not going anywhere. Don't make a frown like that, your face is gonna stay that way.

[Lup reaches up a hand to rub a few soothing circles at Lucretia's back. All of her techniques for comfort come from her experience trying to comfort Taako, which as of late, she's been getting a lot of use out of.] I'll work on Taako, kay? Just.. Just give him some time. You know how he used to be. Well, now he's even more. Not having me around really messed with him. He's still upset, still hurting, even though I'm right there with him. [Sometimes it feels like he doesn't even believe she's real, he's so stuck in mourning the sister he knew.]

I know it's rich hearing it from me, but just be patient. Please?

(She sighs and props her chin up on Lup's shoulder as the other woman draws her into a tight hug. It's an easy gesture, but it helps a lot. It only reminds her that back in the time she's come from she hadn't had a good, long conversation with Lup in a while. The both of them had been so busy lately with their respective plans. She can't remember the last time Lup had hugged her quite like this either, or her Lup; it makes her sad. The last couple of cycles have been face-paced, brutal as the Hunger gets quicker, cleverer, and it's really the kind of time that the both of them need hugs the most.

'I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere'. She sinks properly into the hug, linking her arms in a neat circle about Lup's waist.)

Thanks, Lup. (She mumbles eventually and sighs hard for a second time, as if she's trying to expel all her negativity through her mouth.)

I'll... I'll try. (She doesn't know if she can promise her patience, but if it's what Lup recommends, she can certainly try to keep it in mind as much as possible. It's just that it's going to be hard, avoiding a dear, dear friend when all she wants to do is try and talk to him about it, to get more information. She needs to know why this happened, why she causes it. Lup's retelling is too bare-bones for her liking.)

[When she feels that soft pressure against her shoulder, Lup tilts her head to the side, affectionately bumping their heads together. It had taken years aboard the Starblaster for the elf to let anyone else close to her enough for this kind of tender closeness, but Lucretia's been there in the sweet spot for decades at this point. So as the other woman adjusts to turn this into a proper hug, Lup laughs and squeezes her back.] Horseshit. Like you ever have to try and do anything. The Lucretia I know is always on point. You'll be fine, lady.

[It sucks, but Lup knows they'll all pull through this. Nothing could break their little family apart permanently. She believes in them too much for that.]

So, [Lup lets Lucretia linger in the hug for as long as she needs, but whenever the woman pulls away, she'd still keep an arm slung around her shoulder, bodies tilted together.] Now that the crappy stuff is out of the way, we can get this party started. Taako's being a real dipshit so I'm going to crash with you a few days. [Surprise!] Maybe later you can fill me in more on whatever we've been up to between our cycles. Since we've already shared too much about the future, it can't hurt, right?

Thank you, Lup.

(Lup's arm is warm around her shoulders: this, and the promise of company really helps Lucretia to relax completely. She sinks back into the couch with a sigh, arms folding loosely across her chest. Thank god, honestly. She hadn't been looking forward to spending her first night here alone in her room, but hadn't been feeling up to asking anybody for company, either. Not with how the afternoon had gone. Thankfully, Lup provides the perfect balance of 'down for sleepovers always' and 'isn't as mad as she could have been about this whole future deal'.)

Yeah, that sounds good. Though I'll give you fair warning: there's a lot to fill you in on. (Oh. Of course Lup doesn't know about the cycle she spent alone. Lucretia doesn't know how she feels about that. Perhaps she can skip around it– but she's hardly talked about it since it happened, and there is a little, reasonable voice in the back of her mind that knows that she really ought to, despite her reservations.

She sighs. Everything feels unnecessarily complicated.) And not all of it's good.

[Lup doesn't need to be thanked, so she shoos Lucretia's words away with a wave of her hand before she's reaching for the wine. There's too many emotions up in this tiny apartment, Lup is ready to just get buzzed with her friend and put the unpleasantness of the day behind them. At least for tonight. Tomorrow they can make a few more plans. She can show Lucretia around town, tell her all of the places to visit, the ones to avoid. Point out the people on the network that Lup's already formed relationships with and has come to trust at least slightly. Point out the ones she doesn't trust at all.

She'll do what she can to help prepare her friend, because this place wasn't going to make it easy to adjust to. Lup knew that from experience.]

When is it ever all good? I can take it, no problem. [Some parts may be more difficult to digest than others, but Lup's already had her big once-a-decade emotional breakdown with Taako over this shit. She's feeling pretty confident she can go for round two and not cry this time.

Lucretia's sigh just drags Lup's attention back to her side at the other woman. She elbows her in the side and passes the wine back over.] Let's put that talk away for now. Chat about something less depressing. Like how great a friend I am for bringing you a housewarming gift.

(She laughs in response to that even through her inner turmoil, taking the bottle and lifting it slowly. She lets it rest against her mouth for a moment before she takes a long sip. It's funny– Lup being from an earlier time, but still knowing her so deeply regardless, knowing the best option for her right now isn't sitting, and stewing in this. Lucretia knocks her knee against Lup's, takes another quick gulp from the bottle and then hands it back.)

Okay, okay. Fair.

You are my best friend for bringing me this housewarming gift. Both the wine, and the paints by the way. (She is truly happy about those.) I'll paint something for your place. Something– bizzare, and colourful.

(She can see it in her mind's eye, now that she's thinking about it with a slight thrum of alcohol in her blood.) Just to liven up the place, you know?

[It's all just as strange to Lup, who is having a fairly difficult time even believing the two are actually from varying times. Sure, there's a little something unfamiliar about Lucretia, something stronger and harder and so much more confident, but just gazing at the woman pressed against her side, the elf keeps looking for signs of her age and finding nothing. It had been so much easier with the other three, who all had been out of the cycles for over a decade and had at least a little visible wear on their bodies.

But Lucretia physically looks exactly like Lup remembers last seeing her. There's the same warmth behind her smile, the same faint laugh lines that Lup continues to insist she caused, the same soft flush at her cheeks whenever the two of them drink together. She's both familiar and yet not familiar all at once, but Lup chooses to just embrace the unknown in this moment and just go with it. Lucretia is still Lucretia, whether it's one or two or forty-five years between them.

(Naturally, her stance on that might alter slightly if she was dealing with a Lucretia who'd taken her brother and their friend's memories, but that's a hypothetical that Lup's not willing to exert energy getting upset about right now.)

When the other woman bumps knees against her, Lup laughs and retaliates in kind, knocking her shoulder against Lucretia's. After the drama of her reunion with Taako and Magnus just not even knowing who she was, this feels so much easier. Things aren't fixed and there's so much more that needs to be said, but in this moment, Lup can just bump knees with her best friend, drink wine straight from the bottle, and relish how simple all of this feels.

Lup takes a generous swig when offered the bottle back, wiping her mouth off with the back of her hand.]

I just wanted to do something nice. Magnus and Merle got their own gifts--[a shark dick and a stack of outdated Zoobooks, respectively] So only seemed fair. It--... [No, didn't she herself just say to leave the sad shit behind? The elf shakes her head and grins.] Glad you like it. And hell yeah, that would be rad. A Luc original on my wall.

Edited 2017-09-12 07:14 (UTC)

(That little moment of sincere honesty makes Lucretia smile, and properly this time too, in the way that only her friends can get her to smile.)

Well, thank you. (She slumps back against the couch cushions with her arms folded comfortingly across herself, shoulder pressed to Lup's. This is the most... normal she's felt in a while. The decision on what plan to stick to had upset her enough to have her forgoing any interaction with the others afterwards and before all of that had gone down, they hadn't exactly been kicking back and relaxing. Ever since they got past the eighty-something mark, the Hunger had tightened its resolve: really stuck its head down and worked to get to them. The lights were getting harder and harder to find. They were all so tired. Lucretia can't remember the last time she'd just sat with somebody and drank for fun instead of out of obligation, or in an attempt to forget about something she'd seen.

God, how dark. She gives her head a little shake to clear it of those particular thoughts, mirroring Lup's gesture. Lup's right. They don't need to get into this now: they have time. And she's done her time today, with Taako, with Magnus, and Merle. Lup, too.)

I do like it. You– this is really helpful, you know? Um, (and she casts about for another word, gesturing in the air with one hand,) cathartic. You ground me, Lup. You always have, and I appreciate it. It's cool.

[Coming in fresh after cycle forty-seven, Lup doesn't have a clue about how hard it will get. Even being told those words pointblank, she can't quite understand the harsh truth waiting for her. They go from spending a year casually learning new arts to present to the cave to Lucretia's horrific year alone and Lup deciding that ripping out her soul was the only way for them to continue surviving.

Things get pretty dark in their future.

So Lup shrugs Lucretia's thankfulness off, just assuming that her future self had been keeping up on her promise to make time for the two of them to just have fun. Even with the Hunger always looming in the distance, why would that ever change?]

Don't go all sentimental on me. Get enough of that from Mags. Just chill and drink with me and we can, I dunno, play a stupid game or something. Like normal. Or we could paint some dope shit on your walls for kicks, but then you'd have to live with it and I can't promise I won't do anything inappropriate.

You know?

A little more wine, and I think I'd be all over that painting on the walls thing.

(Case in point, she pulls the wine bottle out of Lup's grasp and has another long sip, because she really does want to chill out today. And to do that, she needs to stop seeing Taako's distressed, twisted expression every time she closes her eyes.)

Stupid game, huh. Okay. What's the uh... (she gestures with the bottle while she tries to come up with something.) Got it. What's the dumbest death you've had so far? I'll think of mine, you think of yours and we can compare.

(It seems like it would be imbalanced, but the count will probably even out between the pair of them, actually. Lucretia has lived 92 cycles but is infinitely more careful with her well being than Lup is, after all.)

[Now that they're leaving the less pleasant stuff behind--because somehow, in their twisted lives, talking about their various deaths didn't make it to the unpleasant list of things--Lup leans back into the couch cushions, shifting to throw her feet up on Lucretia's coffee table, arm still thrown around the other woman. She lets Lucretia have the wine, knowing she needs it more.]

Don't even have to think about it. I've got mine. Cycle Twelve. [It was about the time that Lup started to really form bonds with her other crewmates, not always with Taako attached to her hip.] That was the year Mags and I kept trying to outdo each other. All those stupid challenges. [It had all started off innocently enough...] Can't remember who had the bright idea to see who could hold their breath longest, but we found out that day that we both couldn't out-stubborn death.

Good luck beating that one.

(Lucretia nearly chokes on her next sip.)

Is that what happened? (Cycle twelve was so long ago but she remembers this, the way Magnus had come trailing back to the Starblaster like a guilty dog, tail between his legs and Lup nowhere to be seen.)

God, Lup, we all knew it was for some stupid reason but I didn't think it was like that. Magnus wouldn't tell us, said it was too sad. You idiots. (She's fond though, laughing as she leans into Lup's side. Strange how talk of death can be counted as moving away from more depressing subjects, but over the cycles the lot of them had learned how to lean into their immortality: some a little more than others.)

You're right... I can't top that, (she muses, and passes the bottle.) All I have is that time Davenport told me not to go back into a collapsing building for my things but I did any way– that and... uh, seventy-three, I think. But that was a drunk thing, it feels like it shouldn't count maybe.

Hey, I would have totally won if he'd just given up!

[Lup remembers returning at the beginning of the next cycle, immediately doubling over to laugh while Magnus practically stumbled over his words trying to apologize to her. With tears in her eyes, she'd punched him in the shoulder and brushed the whole thing off, but the memory always stuck with her. It felt like the first time in her life that anyone besides Taako had really seemed to care about her wellbeing so deeply. It had been the start.]

And yeah, yeah. We're idiots that you love. Just try and deny it. [Lup takes a swig of the bottle while Lucretia muses. She is not at all surprised by that first story. Could there be anything more Lucretia?] Okay, you can't give me shit for my stuff if you went into a collapsing building for your freakin' journals. [Those books were going to be the death of her. Wait, cycle seventy-three? Now Lup's interested.] Wait, what? Tell me! Drunk things count!

Magnus giving up at anything? You do know him, right?

(Though, to be fair, on cycle twelve they were still shiny and new to each other, and Lup and Taako particularly difficult to crack. Lucretia still remembers the pain of trying to speak to them at first: impossible to catch one without the other, having to be subjected to the little looks they'd swap lightning fast while you were talking. Only a bit intimidating.

Lucretia pretends to sigh, laying the back of her hand dramatically across her forehead.) I can't deny for even a second, Lup: I love the lot of you. It's a tough job, but somebody has to do it. (She ruins this little mocking performance by going a bit red in the face when Lup gives her a look that she knows all too well: that prying, deeply curious one that means she won't let what you've half-told her go until she hears the rest of it.)

Okay, okay, (she prefaces,) it was just– I dunno, we were drunk, all of us, and we had been on this planet covered in water for most of the cycle. It was called Haling Cove, but Magnus called it Pirate Bay instead and that stuck, it was stupid– anyway, I made a joke about... about skinny dipping and then Taako dared me to go for– uh, a swim, and said that he'd do it if I did and so I... did it. Except I didn't look before I leapt, and I forgot that Davenport had pulled the ship up earlier than evening for some– safety thing. (She shrugs, nonchalant.) So I fell roughly eighty feet and died the moment I hit the water.

Now I do. [Not that it really would have made any difference. Lup was just as stubborn. Even if she knew there was no chance at winning, there was still a fairly good chance she'd rather die than back down. After a half of a century of death being nothing but an inconvenience, it was going to be difficult to train her out of it. Being careful had gone out of style decades ago.

Lucretia throws her hand up dramatically and Lup laughs at the pure drama of it all before taking advantage of the moment to give the other woman a quick tickle against her side. She left it open! She should have known that would happen. Lup always goes for openings!] That's Lucretia. Our very own martyr.

[Suddenly, the other woman goes red and Lup's curiosity over cycle seventy-three grows exponentially. She turns slightly on the couch, just to face Lucretia better for whatever is coming next, leaning in eagerly in anticipation of the tale. And honestly? It does not disappoint.] You...[And here comes the laughter, as much as Lup is trying to hold it in until she can finish speaking. Her slender frame shakes, eyes scrunching together as her grin widens.] You jumped out of the Starblaster. Because my brother dared you to. Naked.

(She's trying to be as dignified and casual about this retelling as possible, but it's ruined of course by Lup making an attack of opportunity against her unguarded side, forcing her to swat her away with little, sputtering giggles.)

I didn't say I was naked, (she protests, because it's true. She didn't say that. It might have been what happened, but she didn't say so and, uh, that makes it a mystery never to be solved.) But uh, yes that is the general gist of what happened. I didn't even really realise that I was falling until it was way too late.

(Coming back into seventy-four had been an exercise in dealing with extreme embarrassment. Taako had hooted with laughter upon her arrival for a good thirty seconds– in very much the same way that Lup is laughing now, actually. Lucretia snatches the bottle of wine from her and takes a big, necessary gulp. These twins will be the actual death of her some day.)

Stop it. (She's starting to laugh too, even as she flips Lup off,) I told you it was a dumb drunk thing!

You, Lucretia, totally went jumping off the side of the Starblaster butt naked. [Oh, it doesn't matter if Lucretia said the word or not, she planted the imagery there in Lup's head and now she's never going to live it down. Damn her mystery, Lup has already filled in the blanks and refuses to accept any other version of this Mad Lib.

Lup's only laughs harder when she gets flipped off, practically cackling by now, eventually having to slide an arm around her stomach while she doubles over, struggling to catch her breath. There's stray tears running down her face and when even she knows it's gotten to a ridiculous point, Lup puts a hand over her own mouth, like she's trying to suffocate her laughter out. Eventually, as difficult as it is, she's left to just some small giggling, no quite able to stop it completely.]

I may have some dumb deaths, but at least I wasn't totally nude for any of them. [She quickly pauses, eyes flicking up in a contemplative look.] Wait, that's right, isn't it? I didn't-- Yeah, no, zero naked deaths for this chick.

Yeah, but I'm not the only one who has! (Lucretia can feel her ears getting hot as Lup cackles away, and resists the urge to set the bottle down so she can press her hands over her face and hide herself from view. This is too much. To be laughed at in this way after sharing her most embarrassing death! Unforgivable.)

Stop, oh my god, (she whines when Lup doubles over, giving her shoulder a shove with her fingertips but Lup carries on regardless for the better half of a minute; honestly, the sight of her doubled up like that, hand over her mouth makes Lucretia struggle to keep a smile off her face. It's extremely stupid. It's just what she needed, after everything that had already happened today.

Eventually she stops, and Lucretia tries to school herself into a deeply unimpressed sort of expression, one she doesn't quite nail because she is still very flustered.) Yeah, at least for– for now. You never know what the future will bring.

Edited (oopsie) 2017-09-21 14:11 (UTC)

Pretty sure you're the only one who died doing it though! That's gotta count for a little more. [Lucretia's attempts to get her to stop laughing are just priceless, especially that unimpressed expression that just barely misses it's mark. Each shove and scowl just continue to draw the last lingering laughs from her, until Lup is left wiping tears from her face, smiling so wide her face hurts.

For her part, Lup tries not to think about how very uncertain her own future is, wondering where she could be and if she'll ever have the chance to do something utterly embarrassing for the rest of the group to laugh at again. Instead, she tips her head backwards against the back of the couch and drags Lucretia closer, squeezing the other woman's arm softly. Not quite an apology, she's not going to apologize for laughing at something that deserved to be laughed at, but something kind and appreciative.

She hates to see Lucretia trapped with the rest of them in Hadriel, but she's so grateful to have her.]

Hey, [she makes a swipe for the bottle back] Up for a little art yet?

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