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[scholiast]

INBOX
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Hi, Lucretia speaking. I'm busy at the moment, but if you'd like to leave a message, I'll get back to you ASAP.
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Comments

[scholiast]

(Lucretia lets this one sit for an hour after she gets it because she can't decide whether it's funnier to reply or to ignore it completely. Eventually she sends back:)

My condolences to your chilly nips.

[spellslots]

[That's okay he wasn't expecting a response, but he laughs when he gets it.]

I wonder if this is how Kravitz feels 24/7

[scholiast]

Surely he doesn't feel the cold? That would be so uncomfortable.

[spellslots]

You know, I never asked but like, we feel it when our skin is cold?

[scholiast]

Yikes.

Perhaps he's used to it?

[spellslots]

He's been dead for a real long time so probably? I don't even know how often he bothers with flesh and shit, he might just be a clackety skeleton most of the time

[scholiast]

I'd prefer to be 'clackety' too if it kept me from feeling cold all the time.

Are you more into the skeleton version or the flesh version out of curiousity.

[spellslots]

[WHAT KIND OF QUESTION]

Oh I wanna fuck the skeleton, for sure

[scholiast]

(ASKING FOR A FRIEND)

Hey I'm not gonna pretend that I understand your, uh, 'needs' or 'desires'

[spellslots]

A hundred years you've known me and you need to ask if I wanna fuck a skeleton

[scholiast]

(She's laughing now, too much to bother with syntax.)

ok 1 you have proven many times over in the past that you are full of surprises and
2 gross gross gross

[spellslots]

I'm gonna put my dick in the skeleton

[scholiast]

I am throwing my phone in the river

[spellslots]

[This is what she gets]

Or maybe I want the skeleton to fuck me, he doesn't have a dick but there are other ways

[scholiast]

Here it goes! I am throwing it in now goodbye

@chronicler is offline, forever

[spellslots]

We're definitely not doing oral, I'm not that into teeth on my dick

[scholiast]

@chronicler can't come to the phone right now or ever again because she is being profusely and utterly sick. Please leave a message after the beep unless your name is Taako in which case leave a message never, good day

[spellslots]

What do you think a skeleton handjob would feel like 🤔🤔🤔

[scholiast]

attachment 043.png

[spellslots]

[He spends like a solid minute laughing]

I guess rim jobs are definitely outta the picture too, fucking shame

[scholiast]

I swear to Istus, Taako

[spellslots]

You can't swear to my goddess

[Has he ever mentioned that???]

[scholiast]

(no, what)

Your
sorry, what? Since when have you had a goddess?

[spellslots]

Oh shit lol
I'm an emissary of Istus since like four months before coming here? In that town where Magnus left the chalice and it got all fucked up

[scholiast]

(Of all the things she had been expecting, this hadn't been anywhere near her list.

It takes her a minute to reply.)

As in you were selected personally? By Istus. The Istus.

Why?